The pull of the flesh. It’s a constant battle. The yearning to eat that treat, have things our way, say the thing we ought not say. Does that sound familiar? What about the other stuff, like gossip, unhealthy thoughts, greed, or vanity. The struggle is real, y’all.
-“Those who are in the flesh cannot please God.” Romans 8:1
It isn’t only our struggle, our babies have that struggle. Those little bundles of sweet smelling, snuggly goodness contain a iron-clad will of the flesh. One that is sometimes stronger than ours. When we first tend to their cries with a coo, an embrace, or nourishment, something in their little body like a tiny, adorable, ribbon-clad light bulb goes off and they know how it feels to get what they want. And so the battle begins.
As they grow up, the cuteness morphs into blatant disrespect and demanding behavior and we simply must put an end to it. So we reason with, demand obedience, and deal out consequences to tame the flesh and bring them into submission. It becomes our duty and our call. Our focus: We WILL make them compliant, caring little people who think before they swing a bat in the kitchen and who bite their tongue when they’re angry at us for telling them no more ice cream and desire above all else to put ten percent of their allowance in the offering basket at church. We read books, we compile relevant Bible verses, and we devote time to prayer at bedtime. We talk to other moms, read blogs, listen to podcasts and we smile and nod in solidarity at the mom in the grocery store line who’s kid(s) are having absolute meltdowns, knowing that they on the same mission as we are (sometimes the nod includes a fist in the air, “Power to the Moms” wink).
Moms, those are all commendable, necessary and worthy objectives. I’m right there with you, in the trenches, training up my boys in the way they should go, praying they don’t depart from it. I get you, because I, too, desire to disciple their hearts toward an intimate, deep, dependant relationship with God through Jesus Christ. I find myself guiding them, spurring them one, pushing them toward the goal. But, fellow battle mommas-in discipling their hearts, we can’t be behind them, pushing them forward; we have to lead them by example.
– “He must increase, but I must decrease.” John 3:30
Please read my heart here…I don’t know your past, or your present. I’m not making judgments on you because you could look at my life and think, “Where does she get off??” I do, however, know what you desire for your children’s future. And I also know the way to see your desire become a reality. Walk your talk. It’s not a foolproof plan of attack, but it works. Just like we’re fighting for the hearts and will of our babies, we have to be aware that Jesus is fighting for our hearts and our will. The pull of the flesh is alive and well in us, and if we don’t lead our children by example on how to bring it into humble submission, our efforts are in vain. We have to show them how to fight the battle of the flesh. And that begins with our personal fight: Our heartfelt desire to choose the Holy Spirit over the desire to tell someone off or make judgments or tell a white lie. We have to be on that mission of submission for our own hearts as well.
– “So he shepherded them according to the integrity of his heart, and guided them with his skillful hands.” Psalms 78:72
I fail miserably to uphold the standard Jesus has set for us, but He loves me anyway. I have to ask forgiveness and pray for strength and self-control, and align my will with His, not my flesh. This is hard work, folks. Like taming the hearts of our children, it requires patience, love and a “get back on that horse” attitude. We can’t let up, we can’t give in, and when we do, we must model how to ask forgiveness and keep marching forward toward Jesus. Our children can only benefit from watching our walk if we’re walking toward Him. If we’re working to tame their flesh and not our own, it falls on deaf ears. Walk this out with your children, show them the real thing, the real fight, the real struggle. They will see that if you can do it, so can they.
Not sure where to start? The most important spot is the Bible. The Bible is “useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness” (2 Timothy 3:16). Dive in and let your children see you in the Word. Follow God’s instructions listed in Deuteronomy 11:18-19,”You shall put these words of mine in your heart and soul, and you shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and fix them as an emblem on your forehead. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you are at home and when you are away, when you lie down and when you rise.” Allow the Word to live in you, through you, and spill out of you. And find other moms, like Moms with Swords, who are on the same mission you are. Nod at them in solidarity and support them in their fight. Allow them to share wisdom with you. And begin lead, not push, your children toward the mission: Jesus.
