Do you ever have those days with your children where you look at them and think, “What am I doing wrong?” Shaking your head, you might wonder, as you pause, breathe deeply and count to ten before saying something really loudly or snarky, “Why can’t they just do (or not do) what I asked?” Somebody? Anybody?
I think we can all agree that most of our children have a hard time walking the straight line. It may not be anything major, but at all ages, the majority of kids will test the boundaries. Perhaps you’re raising angels, but I’ll just say this…I have boys. There…that says it all.
We have rules in our home for our children’s protection, character, and because some things are just right or wrong. My sons, particularly the oldest and most daring one, like to push the limits of the rules, and question everything about them. Despite the rules being for their own good, they don’t understand the dangers or the future consequences of not learning certain lessons. They want what they want, when they want it (usually now) and how they want it. Sound familiar?
Maybe it’s familiar because it’s what how we seem to act from God’s perspective. Yikes…went right for the zinger there. Bear with me though- How often do we pray for things or position things to turn out the way we want, when we want it (usually now) and how we want it? Don’t get me wrong, I feel we’re allowed and encouraged to present our requests, as specifically as we want, to Him. But we then have to also be willing to yield to His rules and His timing and His will for how He answers. We believe in and trust a sovereign God, who loves us and wants the best for us, as we do for our own children. So we have to learn to accept His guidelines, lessons and instructions without pushing the limits or questioning them. We are His children, and oftentimes I think we must test his patience as much as our children test ours.
When I’m able, I try to put myself “in my place” when I am about to put one (or both) of my sons in their place. As I take that all-too-common deep breath and attempt to calm myself to prevent unleashing inpatient or angry words at them for their lack of obedience, I try to picture how often I put God in that position. I picture Him saying, “How many times are we going to have to go through this?” or “This is why I told you not to do that.” It often cuts me down to size before I go off on my children for doing something they shouldn’t have. I tend to show them a little more grace as a result, because I am so very grateful for my Heavenly Father’s grace.
Truly, I am also thankful for His “house rules”. Alive and able to speak to my need, the Bible is full of characters and precepts that perfectly fit the heart of my struggles. And I find that the vast majority of our own house rules have basis in the Bible. In fact, I have verses written next to many of our house rules to back them up (I mean, how great is it to tell them to take their complaints to God? He can handle them without having to count to ten!). When I feel myself wanting to rebel or wanting to act out of my flesh, as our children tend to do to us, I find that prayer and looking to His word brings me into submission and refocuses my attention on what is true instead of the temptation.
So as we’re praying for our wants and desires, or praying to submit our wants and desires to Him, focus on scriptures that are helpful to you. I’ll share one of my favorites for you to use. Since we desire for our children to obey our words, let’s model that obedience to God’s Word.
“Let my cry come before you O Lord; give me understanding according to your word! Let my plea come before you; deliver me according to your word. My lips will pour forth praise, for you teach me your statutes. My tongue will sing of your word, for all your commandments are right. Let your hand be ready to help me, for I have chosen your precepts. I long for your salvation, O Lord, and your law is my delight. Let my soul live and praise you, and let your rules help me.” -Psalm 119: 169-175 ESV
