Defrag. The word takes you back a bit, doesn’t it? If the word means nothing to you, praise God, because you are either too young to remember or you didn’t have a lot of computer time back then (frustrating, patience-building computer time). The term refers to an action we used to have to initiate with our computers that would take segmented pieces of information and fit them together, like pieces of a well-played Tetris game, and was supposed to result in a faster-running computer.
This morning, as I tried to put my finger on what I’m feeling in my current season of life, a season which seems a whirlwind that I can’t catch my breath in, the Holy Spirit whispered the word, “defrag” into my consciousness. It just sat there, like an elephant, in the middle of my mess. I thought about the last time I had defragmented a computer. I looked up whether we were even still supposed to do that (give me grace, sweet younger ones). I’ll save you the tech talk, because quite frankly, I can’t handle it either. The truth I want you to know is this…most computers now are SSD: Solid State Drive. They don’t need to be defragmented. Phew.
Back to the elephant in my mess of thoughts. God, our Almighty, our Everlasting, the Alpha and the Omega, Who Was and Is and Is to come, impressed upon me that He is like the SSD. There is no fragmented way in Him. He is solid, constant, faithful and true. Therefore, my fragmented state is a result of my flesh, my actions, and my attempts to organize life in my own strength. Despite my repeated endeavors and prayer for Him to prioritize, defragment and re-organize my schedule, I have been too busy trying to make it all work to seek His solid state vision for it all. In my scrambled attention to juggling it all, I’ve lost my perspective on the fullness of Who and What He is, resulting in my need to defrag in Him.
I considered my prayer list. Friends and children that are fighting for their very lives, experiencing loss or grief over their children, infidelity or difficulty in marriage, financial and straight up colossal life problems. And here I sit floundering in my fragmented state, slapped with my selfishness, lamenting my whirlwind when the solution, a solid state God who is in a perpetual, never ending posture of offering us His love, His power, His mercy and His grace, is before me. I’m trying to make up for my “lack of” that I feel, when there is no lack in Him.
In all of it, He is good. It’s part of the solid, constant state of His character. Whatever fragmented state I find myself in, or that you may be in the midst of, you can be sure of this. His constant goodness. We are reminded in Psalm 136:1 (and 1 Chronicles 16:34, and Psalm 100:5, and 2 Chronicles 7:3, 5:3, Psalm 118:1 and 138:8 and in more places but our thoughts will fragment trying to look at the numbers) to “Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good, His love endures forever.” Forever. In Christ, the solid rock, we stand. All other ground is fragmented, ebbing and flowing, imperfect and sure-to-fail footing.
When put in perspective, my circus act of juggling my world would be a graciously boring one. In my searching and pleading and reaching for Him in my mess, I forgot to praise Him for my mess. Yes, praise Him for it. Because He is with me in it. Because He allows it. Because He may have called me to it. Because it is a graciously boring one.
The point. God is good, all the time, He is good. In the mess. In the pain. In the confusion. One thing never changes. He is wholly, completely and without fail, good. When we praise that attribute in Him, and focus on Him and His goodness, we can’t help but see it. And He who is good is also faithful to bring us through the mess. To carry us through the pain. To create order out of disordered confusion. God is good, all the time, all the time, He is good.
Praise Him for His goodness. Now. Today. Tomorrow. Next week. Make it part of your defragmenting process. You can go on and on praising Him for it, because it’s Him. It’s His solid state. Hallelujah!
“It is good to give thanks to the Lord, to sing praises to your name, O most High; to declare you steadfast love in the morning, and your faithfulness by night.” Psalm 92:1-2
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